Things have been good, but I get the feeling I'm not doing enough. If I stop pushing myself I feel like I'll fall apart and ruin everything, but to pressure myself like this doesn't feel sustainable. Despite that feeling I have made big improvements in my life; it feels like I'm taking care of the necessities that I've neglected for years and years, but am still not really caring for myself. I dunno...
Long time no see! Turns out I have ADHD (LOL)... so that explains a lot. Since then I've started to realize that I've really been putting off looking after myself. But! In the past week I've started getting treatment and bought glasses (which I've been putting off for nearly a decade (LOL)).
But, in an update to the last post, I in fact did not "move away from reddit and youtube" (LOL). MAYBE I'll start doing more work on this site; it's tough when something else gets my attention because I completely forget about this site. I've made a few (very) simple Flash animations that I might upload or link here.
I want to say I've been so busy with school that I haven't had the time to do much else, but honestly my free time has been sucked up completely by social media. I really do want to quit, but the moment I get any other stresses I fall back onto it. Though I must admit, I've gotten a little better. The perfectionist in me wants to think that I can kick it like nothing, and move onto something else without a second thought. But then, when I inevitably fail to meet my impossible expectations, I think negatively of myself. I think I'm mad because it's difficult. Maybe it's good to realize that it's supposed to be difficult, and the struggle is not linear. The more that I start to make things, the more that I think I'll move away from reddit and youtube.
I... tend to get sidetracked. Been doing travelling, working, and studying over the last seven months since I've made anything for this site. Funnily enough, that was probably the last time I had done much drawing at all. I prefer writing on paper now (I don't have a drawing pad), so maybe I'll start drawing that way and scan it? I really like what the Fancypants flash games did with making the whole game look hand-drawn. My html skills are lame and my drawing is terrible, but I'll get something working at *some* point. Don't hold your breath. Reminding myself that this site exists might drive me to do something more with it. I want something outside of social media..
Feels good to have some semblance of a site :^) Though, it's a little annoying because I feel like I don't know enough html/css to really do what I want. I guess I'm just being impatient. I have a huge list of stuff that'll be really cool to add. I can't draw worth a damn but I think it'd be comfy if I were able to draw most of the site graphics myself. Thanks for viewing my barebones site :^)